The Dog Ate My Homework...and an $83 Check

*Facebook 4/18/10 - Today is puppy day! (or, if you're noticing that we already have six kids and we're adding a puppy...today is INSANITY DAY!) But we like it that way. Clearly.

Here’s what you shouldn’t do if you have 6 kids and don’t know how to train a puppy: get a puppy. Since our general philosophy is to ignore completely the suggestions of all experts, we got two.

The tiny dog came first. She was basically a bribe.

When Bill and I decided that the long-distance dating thing was getting old and we were ready for the next step, we did the logical thing: we bought a house…8 months before I could actually move to live in it. I visited my new home every month, but my children had yet to see it. During April vacation of 2010, we flew the kids out to South Dakota to get a look at their new town. They had visited once before, but this time they knew they were moving and they were excited to really explore. We knew they loved our new town as a vacation spot, and we were anxious to convince my 8-year-old twins and 11 year old son that moving here permanently really was a good idea. We started at home – they were excited about siblings, bunk beds, and the playroom. Then on to the town – they loved that the school was 5 minutes away, that there was a bike trail basically in our back yard and that the water park was open all summer. Just to be sure, we sweetened the deal…and let the six kids pick out a puppy together. We found a breeder who had 10 Shitzu-Poodle mix puppies and brought the kids over to pick one out.

The breeder originally told us that all 10 puppies were available, but after watching my super-sized family descend on them, she carefully removed the smallest, most fragile-looking two and said, “These might not be the right puppies for your house.” I wasn’t offended. She was right. As the kids played with the puppies, the breeder and I chatted about our situation. I told the story the same way I always did: We met through a mutual friend who loved us both and knew we were both single with three kids, and had a million other things in common. We talked on the phone all day every day for six weeks and then met for a weekend in Connecticut…love at first Facebook chat. Now we’re getting married and blending our two families: three of his, three of mine. Then the breeder said what every-single-person-who-has-ever heard-this-story says: “Oh! The Brady Bunch!” It’s a story…

The kids picked a tiny black puppy, and named her Alice. (You, know, like the housekeeper?)

Shitzu-Poodles are supposed to be some kind of super-dog. They are supposed to be extremely smart, non-shedding and easy to train. Well, Alice doesn’t shed… They are sometimes called Shi-poos. Bill says that’s about right, she poos and poos all over the house.

She is pretty cute, though:

*Facebook 7/16/10 - My puppy is allergic to the carpet shampoo. If you've never seen a 4 pound black Shih-poo sneeze 20 times in a row you are missing out!

In September, we decided life wasn’t hectic enough. When our friend’s Golden Retriever had puppies, Bill made the mistake of taking the children (me) to see them.

One of them turned into my birthday present…

We named him Brady. By now everyone was calling us the Bunch. We even received mail addressed to “Jody, Bill and the Bunch. When Brady came home, we started planning our Holiday card –

In the beginning, Brady and Alice were the same size.

Not so much anymore.

Brady is huge. But he still thinks he’s a lap dog. This can make for uncomfortable situations, especially when we have guests. He is also very, very naughty.

*Facebook 10/5/10 – Note to self. Do not leave Brady alone with a package of 24 rolls of Quilted Northern. My house has been TP’d – on the inside.

*Facebook 11/6/10 – Brady now outweighs both little kids put together, but still thinks it is okay to jump into my arms when I get home. #needobedienceschool #ouch

*Facebook 12/16/10 - It's official. Brady ate my homework. AND an $83 check.

*Facebook 4/6/11 - The cops called tonight because our neighbors complained about our dogs making excessive noise. Apparently, the neighbors have no issue with children making excessive noise....or maybe the police don't have a department for that.

*Facebook 4/16/11 – It appears Brady is subsisting on a steady diet of hair ties, socks and action figures. #gross #don'taskmehowIknowthis

We’ve worked on training both dogs. We’ve tried treats, crate training and most recently, a big fenced in area for them outside. We have good intentions, but full hands. We decided to go with the philosophy, “You can’t change others. You can only change yourself.” We bought a carpet shampooer.

*Facebook 4/7/11 6 children, 2 dogs and one husband are sleeping right now at my house. Calling here and waking any one of them with the ringing phone will result in your immediate dismissal from my friends list.

*Facebook 4/16/11 - Brunch conversation: kid (yeah, go ahead, you figure out which one): if we get another dog we can name him Pluto. Bill: if we get another dog we're naming it Completely Freakin' Insane."

Comments

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I love your family and your stories!!!!

Posted by: Kristen | 04/24/2011 at 01:32 AM

This may have been my fav story so far... course I love dogs and kids... and had a shitzupoo.. seriously the best dog ever! When he died we cried for days. We now have a new girl but she is a diff breed and naughty compared to the " other ".. Enjoy it all Brady family..sent it on to the previous owners.. know they will love your stories.
hugs~!

Posted by: dar burgard | 04/23/2011 at 11:49 AM

you have one big happy family! and brady and alice are funny and cute :) sorry to hear about your notebook and check.. following you back from bloggy moms, you have a great Easter!

Posted by: Account Deleted | 04/23/2011 at 11:20 AM