Three of my kids decided that we should play a family game today. As they came up from the playroom with The Game of Life (again), I paused to consider which game most closely resembled my actual life… Monopoly? Not! Sorry? Nope! Battleship? Occasionally. Operation? Well, I do sometimes feel like people are pulling me in all different directions… Candyland? Do they make Rumland? No, I decided that my life actually mimics Charades.
You know, because I’m frantically flailing about hoping that somebody – anybody(!) will figure out what I’m trying to communicate?!?
Tonight, however, we played Life. It occurred to me, in the first few minutes of the game, that this game neither bears any resemblance to real life, nor prepares you in any way for the reality of the world! If the Game of Life is really how my life is supposed to be, then I have some issues.
First of all, you start off with 10,000 dollars. Um, hello? I think someone misread the rules when I started MY turn!
In my first turn on the game tonight, I landed on “Study for test, miss turn.” On what planet am I going to stop playing a fun game to study for a test? This is not a very realistic example of college life. What are we teaching these kids?
After three turns, my daughter, son and I, who all chose “college” were 100,000 dollars in debt and my “career” daughter has a mansion, $320,000, and is halfway through the board. (She would go on to win the game, and stand in a shower of dollar bills.)
In my fifth turn, I paid $25,000 to a doctor (my nine-year old) to repair damage done to myself in a skiing accident. Skiing?!? Me?!?! Clearly the creators of this game have no idea what they are talking about.
Later, I landed on a spot that said, “Twin Girls! Collect Gifts!” Now this one I know for sure is a typo. It should have said, “Twin Girls! Collect Diapers! (and maybe get a nanny!)”
Two out of the four players won the lottery during this game. Did this teach my children anything about gambling? How about the fact that I decided that those were pretty good odds and took them out to buy a powerball ticket afterward? Did that help?!?
And also this: All of my children retired before me. Well, at this rate…
The game also pointed out some of my children’s concerning characteristics Not one of them is very good at debt management, at least one of them is a cheater, and all three of them put back the “teacher” career card because “The salary was a joke, Mom!” Yes, I know.
Some things are clearly missing from the game. For instance, where’s the “Get-a-divorce.-Meet-the-man-of-your-dreams-and-raise-a-blended-family-of-eight-in-South-Dakota” spot? And couldn’t it be attached to a “Win $100,000” spot? How about “Get out of Hamster-Ownership Free?”
I must admit, though, that I love an activity where I can win a sports scholarship, an art competition AND the Nobel prize all in an hour…
Copyright © Jody Hoffman 2011
I love this! I remember playing Life as a kid and feeling grown up just by playing. Little did I know......
Anywho, you keep making me laugh and I so appreciate an East coast girl living in South Dakota so I wanted to let you know I am passing along the Versatile Blogger Award to you! Come check it out!!
Kim
http://www.mytwintasticlife.com/
Posted by: Kim | 10/10/2011 at 08:38 PM
I definitely agree with the playing-a-game-instead-of-studying-for-a-test thing. I don't think half of the kids here even know what studying is.
Posted by: Lauren! | 10/09/2011 at 08:38 PM
I have a minivan that seats seven, and I'm constantly having to double buckle an eighth for a playdate. Why can't I have a car like in the Game of Life where I can just shove as many pink and blue pegs into the car as I can? It doesn't matter if there's a slot for them. Pile in, gang.
Posted by: Cathy Flynn | 10/07/2011 at 10:21 PM
I need the "Get out of Guinea pig ownership free" card!
Posted by: Kristen | 10/07/2011 at 10:35 AM
Another wonderful story, Jody. Thanks for sharing. I am SO happy to see that SOME families do still play BOARD games.
Posted by: Karen Devlin | 10/07/2011 at 09:09 AM